Fellatio Cafe in Geneza is offering the world’s best coffee

jet_d_eau fountain geneva

Mirror: A new Swiss café will allow customers to order oral sex with their cup of coffee . The £42 deal will be offered at the shop in Geneva which is due to open at the end of the year.  It said it was copying similar popular cafés in Thailand .

They will be able to order a coffee and then select a prostitute using an iPad, said the firm that plans to set up the café, Facegirl.

Bradley Chavet, from Facegirl, told Swiss newspaper Le Matin that men will be able to order a drink and then make themselves comfortable at the café’s bar.   The full service will make the coffee one of the most expensive in the city – and probably Europe – at an eye-watering 60 Swiss francs, about £42.  And there will also be an additional five franc surplus for the drink.

Critics have blasted the proposals, claiming only those setting up the business would benefit from it.


First off, lets address these faceless “critics”.  As the great Theodore Roosevelt once said, “It is not the critic who counts; the credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”   Ted’s exactly right there.  And we should listen to a man who took whisky and cigars as a child to cure asthma.

Anyway – those critics could not be more wrong in saying only those setting up the business would benefit from it.

For a start, it would become the first reason to visit Geneva since money-laundering laws began to be policed globally.  Tourism could rocket. Coffee producers in poor South American countries will benefit from the extra coffee sales.  Prostitutes will be much safer working out of a Starbucks than the john’s car.  Plus – the girls can use the coffee to get the taste out of their mouths.  They’ll also make more money, as nothing – nothing – makes coffee taste better than a blow job.

Author: Max Smith

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